30 August 2007

nothin' but net

Am now officially a TEFL graduate. Hooray!

Final exam began at 9:30am and I was done a little before noon. Passed it with flying colors. Got my grades for my other projects, all passes. Had my 15 minutes with the moderator, who was actually slightly scary despite reassurances from the directors, and he didn't seem displeased with me so I'm going to count that one good too.

But of course am sick now. After a month of really intensive study and long days and air conditioning and weird Madrid weather (frying hot yesterday and almost chilly this morning) I suppose it's no wonder. On the one hand am annoyed because I really wanted to be able to celebrate, but on the other hand I'm grateful that I didn't get sick any earlier. At this point it's just a sore throat and a tiny bit of congestion...hopefully by taking care of myself (went to bed very early last night, drinking lots of orange juice, taking a nap today, etc.) I can ward off a serious cold. I went to the farmacia this morning and asked for some throat lozenges with zinc in them and the pharmacist looked at me like I had two heads. She gave me a box of tablets that are supposed to help throat infections. So far I can't tell that they do anything at all except make the front of your mouth (but not your throat) slightly numb and make you dizzy. Will try another this afternoon to see what happens.

Now am off to take a nap. Will take some pictures for you tonight at our celebratory drink event.

29 August 2007

one day left!

Okay, a quick update because I need some sleep.

First, the girls and I have decided to take the piso out in BFE, but even BFE in Spain has public transportation. Love it! We will meet with H. this weekend to sign the papers, etc. Also, am crushing hard-core on H. Very bad.

Today was much less stressful than I anticipated, perhaps because I did homework last night until 1am. But aside from the final exam and moderation I am FINISHED!!!

26 August 2007

stranger than fiction

Talked to the girls today, & they had quite a story to tell. They'd managed to lock themselves out of their apartment last night and since the owner is away on vacation and there's no portera, they had to wait around for a neighbor to appear so they could explain their problem. The neighbors did everything they could think of to help the girls break into their apartment, but nothing worked (good to know). So the neighbors called their friend over, who is a firefighter. The fireman tried a couple tricks of his own, but to no avail. Then he sent for his son, who's about 7 or 8 years old. The kid shows up with some rope and a harness. Everyone goes up to the apartment just above the girls' apt. The owners let them in, and the kid gets in the harness and his dad lowers him out of the window onto the terrace of the girls' apartment. Luckily the terrace door is open, so the kid just walks into the house and opens the front door for them. Of course the girls were completely mortified that they'd caused these people so much trouble, but at the same time it goes to show that some Spaniards will go to great lengths to help a sister (or two) out. How cool is that?!

Was going to go to a museum today, but I haven't gotten around to it. Fell asleep on the couch for a while, now am making lunch. Should probably just stay home & do some work anyway...god that sounds boring. Sigh.

25 August 2007

lessons unlearned, el piso, esperanzas

Got home a little before 7 this morning. It was definitely not my inention to stay out all night again, and for most of today I was sorry I had. At least had much less to drink this time, but still did not sleep well and felt a little iffy for a while. Am hoping next weekend I will have the sense to go home after tapas instead of following the girls to the O'Connell's dance floor. (Though I must admit, we did meet some very striking Morrocan men there who were fabulous dancers. Almost makes the hangover worthwhile...;*)

Despite the resaca (hangover), had to get up and head out to where the girls are staying. Had a little lunch with them and then we went to meet H., who showed us the apartment in Los Aguiles. The apartment is nice, though the decor is not at all to my taste. We would have to cover the couches with sheets and take down the hideous painting in the living room. But the apartment gets a lot of light and, while it's small, it's not a bad size. There is one bedroom that is about twice the size of the other two and has a double bed. The girls & I have already decided that if we take the apartment we'd have to rotate rooms every so often so we could all enjoy some time in the big room. But the highlight of the trip was H. himself. A beautiful, beautiful man in his early thirties...honest and warm and with a sense of humor...took a chunk of time out of his weekend to meet with us and was extremely patient while I translated. He's actually the son of the apartment's owners & is just helping them out while they are on vacation. The girls & I joked afterwards that we might have to take the apartment just to see H. every now & then. Hee hee.

On a completely unrelated note, I have to say that almost all my preconceptions about the Spanish have been proved false. Unlike Sevilla, Madrid is a place with a lot more diversity. For example, there is an enormous population of Latin American immigrants here. And while in Sevilla the women were stick insects and everyone dressed to the nines, here there are plenty of overweight individuals and most people dress just like they do in Portland. There's a little bit of everything. Have seen young men wearing baggy jeans hanging off their non-existent asses, have seen women go out in pink track suits with matching flats, everyone and their grandmother wears flip-flops (saw one grandmother wearing flip-flops with kitten heels!!!), and even saw one guy in the metro who was wearing pajama bottoms with his flip-flops. The good side to all of this is that I don't feel nearly as self-conscious and inadequate here as I'd expected to. I'd expected to feel fat and unfashionable, but instead I feel I fit in...and am even sometimes better dressed than most!

Deep thought of the day: I find it both odd and compelling that the word esperar means both "to hope" AND "to expect." They don't have separate words for these concepts. Which means that hopes and expectations are the same thing in this language.

A cool thing happened just now: a Real Madrid game is on TV and most people in my neighborhood are watching it, either at their homes or in bars...somebody must have made a goal (or barely missed it) because just now a cry of surprise rose up and filled the barrio. I could hear it through the closed patio door and over the buffeting wind.

24 August 2007

welcome, weekend!

Finished the learner profile & turned it in. Am super glad that's over. Just hope I don' t have to re-do any of it. There's another thing due on Monday, but that's not as serious. It's the three teaching practices I'm a little worried about. But the one on Monday is going to be fun fun FUN! The topic I was given is "dance," so we're going to listen to some music and of course do a little dancin'. Disco dancin', 80's style dancin' (a la Breakfast club), cha-cha, HA HA! Is going to be FUN! =*)

Going out tonight with the girls for a little while. Tomorrow we have plans to search for apartments & we have an appointment with a landlord to look at one place...it's cheap and furnished and seems really nice...but it would be a 30 min. metro ride to get to the center of town. We're also looking at a 5 bedroom place right next to Retiro park. The rent (with five of us) would be slightly more than the other place, but the location is BOMB! Would love to live right next to that enormous, lush green park. and it's closer to the city center and in a really beautiful neighborhood. Will keep you updated on all that.

Hmm...no interesting observations for you today, I'm afraid. My brain is a bit too fried. Though some of us from the school did go into a cafe this morning and the owner was working and seemed really excited to see us despite it being a fairly busy place, and when we all got up from our table to gawk at the food display and some other people came in & tried to sit at our table the other waiter told them they couldn't sit there because it was ours. They had some great tortilla, and they've managed to make their coffee taste like it's spiked with Kalhua or something. I thought that was rather nice, actually. I would go out of my way to eat at that place again.

23 August 2007

Under Pressure

We are all feeling the pressure of approaching deadlines, but that didn't stop us from trying to go out for Thai food after class today. Unfortunately the Thai restaurant closes between lunch and dinner, so we had to resort to the same Italian restaurant we've ended up at two or three times before. This time I had the tagliatelle al funghi and it was so good I didn't even offer to share. Yum yum! Unfortunately the waiters there always manage to seem a little rude, so I think that was our last time eating there for a while.

The girls & I are also no closer to finding a place to live, which is freaking me out a bit...but I just had a chat with my roommate who said that if the other roommate agrees, I can stay until the end of September and if necessary the girls can come sleep on the couch here for the last week of September until we find a place. Would not be an ideal situation, but is better than sleeping in a park.

22 August 2007

i miss grindel!!!


I miss that cute little face and her talking and even her snoring. Pets to Grindel!!!

Un dia normal. Nothing particularly noteworthy or traumatic happened. Suppose it is good thing. It was a little cooler today, for which I am extremely grateful. Actually got cold last night and had to put on sweats and a long-sleeved cardigan and then cover up with my winter coat. (Is because I have no sheets or blankets. Everything I'm using is on loan & they didn't have extras of those.) But am willing to put up with being a little cold at night if it means I don't have to sweat all day long.

Got to talk to my very good friend C. on the phone tonight. Was lovely to have contact with someone back home. I feel the same way when Mom calls too.

So if anyone was thinking about possibly sending me a care package, here are some ideas: a bottle Frank's hot sauce, a jar of peanut butter, and/or a good book. Fiction. Oh! Or the DVD's I left in my room at home because I didn' t have room in my bag! Am dying to watch a movie...

21 August 2007

white is in

White is the hot color for women this season here in Madrid. Everyone seems to have a cute little white top and a snow white dress. But the disturbing part comes when they turn to white pants or mini skirts. The problem with summer fabrics is that they're thin. I'll tell you that panty lines are NOT in. So the problem with summer fabrics in white is that your panties would show, so they just don't wear any. Which leaves what? Yes, you guessed it: flesh. I'm sorry, but I'd much rather see a woman's panties through the fabric of her pants or skirt than her naked ass. But maybe I'm in the minority here.

Today was an emotional day. The class I taught was very taxing. I put a lot of energy into it, and when it was over it was like coming down off a high and I could do nothing but cry for a while. Nothing horrible happened...one student fell asleep a couple times, but I knew it wasn't my fault. I did feel the class was a little slow at a couple points, but overall I thought I did a great job. And I got the best mark on this teaching practice that I've received so far. But it was just exhausting. Then after school I went with the girls to help them get cellphones and we worked ourselves up into such a giggling frenzy that tears were rolling down our cheeks and we were practically falling over onto the sidewalk. It was so infectious that I couldn't help smiling and giggling to myself all the way home. I'm sure I looked like a total looney. Ah well.

No more teaching practices this week is the good news. I have time to catch up on my Learner Profile project and plan my telephone class with the student. And am very excited because on Monday of next week my teaching topic is dance. Hooray!!! Traded with a classmate to get that topic and absolutely cannot wait to teach the pre-intermediates the basic east coast swing step. I'll also have a one-on-one class (very difficult because it's 50 minutes with one student) and one other class on any ol' topic I want next week. Of course, next week is also the last week of the course, so there will be exams and moderation as well. Eeek! Lots & lots to do.

20 August 2007

Am having fun. Yes, actually having fun. Though I have a monton of homework to do tonight. I teach tomorrow, and on top of that our learner profiles are due on Friday. Eek! But at least I don't have another teaching practice this week. It'll give me time to get the learner profile done. (Learner profile = humongous project that culminates in a 20 minute telephone class with one of the students attending our free English classes.)

Not much else going on. Am getting along well with the classmates and the teachers. Am looking forward to living with the girls, though we haven't really made progress on looking. Luckily, we all have the option of staying in our present apartments into September.

Oh yes, the big news today: was coming out of the bread/pastry shop at lunch today and some random guy pushing a stroller whistled like a bird at me and poked me in the tummy. Considered slapping him upside the head but couldn't do it in front of a small child.

19 August 2007

a view of my room


Attached picture is my bedroom. As you can see, is extremely narrow & small, but suits me just fine. I don't have a lot of stuff. It has a built-in desk area and an Ikea wardrobe. Am very excited about the latter, as am mad about all things Ikea. Can't tell you how excited I will be to spend all my money at the new Portland Ikea once I move back. Three cheers for cheap, stylish, Swedish furniture!!!

Today met up with a couple of my classmates ("the girls" I call them because there are only three of us in our class) and we went to Retiro Park and then to the Prado Museum. At the Prado, saw Velazquez and Goya yet again, but also saw some new stuff, including this kick-ass painter they call...El Bosco, I think. Seemed centuries ahead of his time. Painted in the medieval period, but had touches of Dali in him. Absolutely fabulous. Will have to look him up now. Yes, here is link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hieronymus_Bosch

Nothing much to report. My next teaching practice is Tuesday, this time with the Elementary group, or "Elee's" as they are called by our teachers. Is the most difficult group because they understand almost nothing. One has to communicate almost entirely via gestures and modeling. The topic given me as a guide for what I'm to teach them is "friends and friendship." Kill me now. (Just kidding!) No, it should be a good challenge.

18 August 2007

a day (or two) of recovery


The attached picture is the view from the patio. The apartment I'm staying in is on the 8th floor, which is about as high as it gets around here.

I met up with friends at about 10:30 last night in Sol. Our first stop was the Museo de Jamon (Museum of Ham) because I'd read that you can get good and cheap beer and munchies there. Next we went to O'Neills, an Irish bar not far off the plaza. I'd been looking forward to the chicken nachos, but by the time we got there they'd closed the kitchen. Blast. Then we went in search of a dance club, but had an unreasonably difficult time finding one. Eventually the girls and I decided our need for a bathroom was greater than our need for a dance floor, and we ducked into the first likely place we could find. Turned out it had a dance floor as well, so killed two birds with one stone. Stayed for a half an hour or so and then moved on to another small club, where I met the world's only "Irishman" with an English accent. (Hmm...) The club started winding down around 5:30am, so we left. I escorted the "Irishman" back to his hotel (completely innocent on my part, I assure you) and then took the metro home. Got in just a few minutes before 8am. Slept like crap for several hours and then had a few hours of good sleep. Got up today at 6:30pm. Am definitely not going out again like that for quite a while. I know I used to be able to do it all the time, but I guess I'm just getting too old for it now.

Today I particularly miss: buffalo wings and Laughing Planet Burrito. I'm thinking about spending the next however long looking for buffalo wings in Madrid and then writing an article for In Madrid magazine about that quest. Hmm...maybe the Hard Rock Cafe has some??? Or perhaps there's a Chili's here. Why not? There was one in Paris.

17 August 2007

tgif

Today I saw personal lubricant and condoms beside athlete's foot spray in the pharmacy store window. Interesting choice of placement. It makes as much sense to me as what the Spanish choose or do not choose to translate from English to Spanish. The movie Die Hard became La jungla de cristal (The Glass Jungle), but Ghost just stayed Ghost.

We are oficially half way through the course. Can hardly believe it. This week went much better than the first, and at the end of it I'm not nearly as exhausted as I was at the end of last week. Have some homework to do this weekend, but am by no means feeling anxious or overwhelmed by the amount of work. Is great.

Have made plans to go out tonight with a bunch of classmates. We intend to stay out all night, so I'm off to take a nap now.

16 August 2007

second practice teaching session

Had my second teaching practice today, this one with the upper intermediates. Two people came to class, which makes things a bit difficult but hey it's better than only one (or none!). The more direct teacher observed me and will give me feedback tomorrow, but I did get a little out of her today. She said that she thought I did a very good job. She said she would've changed the first 20 minutes of my lesson, but otherwise it was "near perfect." Hm. But that's why we're here, right? To make mistakes and learn from them. That's why they call it "practice."

After school, went & had a couple copas (glasses of wine) with some classmates and our main teacher. Was really nice to just relax and chat with them all. And great news! I have roommates! Two of my classmates--the only other two girls in my course--have agreed to let me share a flat with them. YAY! We will meet tomorrow to discuss ground rules, preferences and details. I think the three of us will all live together really well.

Am missing: Mom (of course), Mexican food, a good mattress, cooking, and my friends. Not necessarily in that order.

15 August 2007

Continue to be in better spirits today. The course's pace is much more relaxed this week, which helps a lot, and I think just having that first teaching practice out of the way was more helpful than I'd anticipated. Have my second teaching practice tomorrow. Am reasonably confident in my lesson plan and I already know I like the group: these are the upper intermediates that always find a way to talk about sex. Only worry is that no one will show up, as tomorrow is the day after a national holiday and many people take off days around holidays to go on short vacations. But if there is at least one person, I think I can make it work. Two would be even better.

After considering input from Mom and Dad as well as my own feelings, have decided not to take the job in Alzira. I don't think it would meet my needs for variety and beauty and entertainment. Possibly also community/companionship. Will stay in Madrid instead, as originally planned. Hope to talk to a couple of my classmates tomorrow about possibly renting a flat with them.

Question: has someone been passing these blog entries on to Grandma, as she requested? If not, would someone please do so? I don't want her to feel left out. Thanks very much.

14 August 2007

warming up to Madrid

It now seems definite that I will be offered a job with the school in Alzira. The directors of that school have talked with the directors of my school and named names of the people they're most interested in, and I've been informed that I'm in the top 3. They hope(d) to take 3-4 teachers to Valencia. And I'm still completely uncertain about whether I want the job. This morning I was sure I would take it, and at this moment I'm sure I wouldn't. I doubt myself, and wonder whether I'm trying to convince myself that I want it just to have some certainty and because I was a little soured on Madrid. But this evening I flipped through In Madrid, the city's English language entertainment magazine, and I got excited because there's so much to do here: concerts, theatre, museums, intercambios (language exchanges) almost every night of the week, an English language magazine to work for...you get the idea. They won't have all that stuff in Alzira. But because Alzira is smaller, I think it more likely that I would meet and mix with native Spaniards...though I have no idea whether that's actually true. One of my problems is that I can find the advantages and disadvantages of anything, and I can talk myself into or out of pretty much anything without knowing what it is I really WANT to do. Sigh. It's a very tough decision.

Am in a better mood in general today because I got to socialize a bit yesterday and today with some of my classmates. And got to eat some yummy Italian food by the Reina Sofia after school. Though again I had the problem where the waiter was expecting to not understand me, so he didn't understand me, and that was kind of annoying. But it feels good to connect with people and get to hang out a bit. Things are a bit more relaxed a school this week...a little more self-paced due to the teaching practice and lesson planning sessions and all that. Am very glad to have a little more unstructured time during the day, though we all have a lot of work to do still.

Tomorrow is a National holiday in Spain. No idea why. Am sure I could find out easily, but I don't really care that much as we don't have the day off from school. Just means there is no teaching practice tomorrow, so we'll either skip ahead in the lessons or have more unstructured time during the day to work on all our projects. Personally hope it is the latter, as I prefer a slightly more relaxed pace and the extra time to ask the teacher questions.

13 August 2007

having finished my first teaching practice

Today at 2pm I had my first teaching practice session, to a group of pre-intermediate students. Although I was nervous to begin with and felt I talked too much the whole way through, overall I think I achieved my learning objectives (as they call them in this course) for the lesson. The feedback from the teacher-observer was much more positive than I had anticipated, and she managed to couch her constructive criticism in a way that was easy for me to hear and I agreed with all of it. I teach again on Thursday, this time to upper intermediates...a group that is notorious for always bringing the conversation around to sex. I think we'll get on very well. ;*)

After the teaching sessions, we were informed that a couple women from a new language school outside of Valencia were visiting and we had the opportunity to interview with them. I did, and here is the gist: guaranteed 12 hours a week, 3 hours a day for 4 days, with a salary of 700 Euro per month. The cost of living in Alzira--a town of 50,000 about 30 min. outside of Valencia--is much lower than in Madrid. For example, one could share a flat for about 150 Euro a month as opposed to the 350-500 Euro a month one would expect to pay in Madrid. The teaching job would include everything from children 4 years old all the way up to business English for adults. The school is just starting, so the directors hope to build a clientele and to be able to offer more teaching hours and greater salary in time. The position is a contract position and I would be expected to stay through June. (I neglected to ask about Christmas break, so I don't know what the expectations are regarding that.)

So what do you all think? What are the advantages and disadvantages to taking a position like that, if I'm offered it? What other questions would you ask about the circumstances? They will want an answer by the end of the week. Your input is greatly appreciated.

12 August 2007

Walt Whitman, your song echoes in my soul

I received a copy of Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass from an Internet friend while I was an undergrad. My friend was a Master's student in English at PSU at the time and planned to write his thesis on Whitman's influence on American poetry. I had never read Whitman other than a poem here or there in an anthology, so he felt it his duty to expose me to more of Whitman's poetry.

I began with bits of "Song of Myself" and it brought tears to my eyes. Whitman's poetry is so kind, so compassionate. He writes of his love for all human beings, regardless of age, rank, nationality, or any other distinguishing characteristic. But as I was in college and had plenty to read already, I didn't really get into it.

On a whim, I took Leaves of Grass to Sevilla when I went to study there. I only opened the book once--when I went to Parque Maria Luisa by myself one afternoon--but again enjoyed it. Again it struck me how compassionate and loving the personna is...how he years for deep connection with his fellow human beings...how he sees all the world as one family. But again I was busy, and did not make time to read more.

Since I remembered Whitman as being a comfort to me the last time I went to Spain, I brought him again this trip. This weekend I've been reading poems at random--"Salut au Monde!" "Song of the Open Road," "Song of the Answerer." Here is an excerpt from "Salut au Monde!":

You whoever you are!
***
Health to you! good will to you all, from me and America sent!

Each of us inevitable,
Each of us limitless--each of us with his or her right upon the earth,
Each of us allow'd the eternal purports of the earth,
Each of us here as divinely as any is here.

Again the poetry has brought tears to my eyes. And I recognize something else in it too, something new. When the narrator speaks, he is always alone thinking about loving people, never with people and thinking about loving the people he's with. Someone once told me that Whitman used to beat his wife from time to time. When I consider the contradiction between his poetry and this alleged fact, I can actually relate to it quite easily. I too have this thing inside me which wants to love all people, to be connected to all people, to accept everyone and be accepted. But when I go among people, it's too easy to become irritable and jaded. Too easy to feel my own needs are not met and to become wary and suspicious, not to mention bitter. I find myself judging people and distancing myself from them (because I feel judged and rejected) rather than accepting people and making greater efforts to connect with them. Here is another exerpt, this from "Song of the Open Road":

Out of the dark confinement! out from behind the screen!
It is useless to protest. I know all and expose it.

Behold through you as bad as the rest,
Through the laughter, dancing, dining, supping, of people,
Inside of dresses and ornaments, inside of those wash'd and trimm'd faces,
Behold a secret silent loathing and despair.

No husband, no wife, no friend, trusted to hear the confession,
Another self, a duplicate of every one, skulking and hiding it goes,
Formless and wordless through the streets of the cities, polite and bland in the parlors,
In the cars of railroads, in steamboats, in the public assembly,
Home to the houses of men and women, at the table, in the bedroom, everywhere,
Smartly attired, countenance smiling, form upright, death under the breast-bones, hell under the skull-bones,
Under the broadcloth and gloves, under the ribbons and artificial flowers,
Keeping fair with the customs, speaking not a syllable of itself,
Speaking of any thing else but never of itself.

11 August 2007

looking on the bright side

Will say that I am thoroughly appreciating being able to walk and/or take public transportation everywhere. Have not once had the inclination to drive a car...though I have to say that going grocery shopping this morning was a little more difficult than what I'm used to. You can't buy more than you can carry for several blocks. Have also noticed that I have indeed lost weight in the last two weeks. Not entirely healthy weight-loss, but now that I have groceries I should be able to make my own lunches & dinners. And when I am able to have a one-on-one conversation with a native Spaniard, for example one of my roommates or the roommate's brother, I do feel that I am improving my listening and speaking skills as well as learning more about the culture. So a few goals being achieved. Very nice.

My grocery shopping trip this morning yielded another lesson in culture. I was wandering around the store with my cart, trying to figure out what the hell half the stuff was and where I might find the stuff I wanted, and I saw the produce stand with veggies & fruit and all that stuff on it. The only onions they had were fresh ones, with the green stalks still on, so I grabbed a bunch. But then I didn't see the garlic cloves anywhere and I'd been around the store once already, so I asked the store employee standing next to me where they were, and his first reply, though I didn't catch all of it, had something to do with the onions rather than the garlic. He seemed irritated with me. Eventually I figured out that I was not supposed to touch the produce. Instead, I was supposed to tell the produce man what I wanted and he would get it and bag it for me. Oops! Live and learn, right? So note to all foreign grocery shoppers in Spain: whatever you do, don't touch the produce. Wait for someone to help you get what you need.

I did not go out last night. I fell asleep and slept a long time...maybe 12 hours. In my sleep, I found myself. I didn't even know I was lost, that's how lost I was. I realized in my sleep that this last week has not been enjoyable for me, nor have I been the person I want to be, nor am I getting what I want out of the course. I'm stressing too much about the school work and forgetting to enjoy life. It's made me serious and irritable. I think that from now on I'm going to focus on what really matters (the teaching practice, the parts of the assignments that I'm actually learning from, etc.) and put my energy into that instead of sweating all the details. This is not my normal attitude toward work and school, but we just don't have time during this course to do everything perfectly and maintain our sanity as well. So I've done some homework today, but I've decided to go out tonight instead of staying home to do homework as I'd originally planned. It will be good for me.

10 August 2007

finally friday

The week is finally over!!! Three more to go. (Uf!) I can't decide whether I want to go out tonight or not. On the one hand, I could probably use some sleep and I only have a few Euros left in my pocket and the FedEx package with credit card, debit card and checks won't arrive until Monday. On the other hand, I don't actually feel that tired at the moment and I could use a night out with fun people and I could always use a credit card at a supermarket to get food, etc. tomorrow.

Have quite a lot of homework to do this weekend and I have my first teaching session on Monday. I'm trying very hard to forget about it so I don't make myself sick with nerves. It's not the teaching that makes me nervous; it's the harsh judgment I know is coming afterward. I have a hard time taking blunt criticism, so I know it's going to be a very emotionally exhausting day. Will need to treat myself well this weekend to put myself in a good mental space (another argument for going out tonight).

The highlights of my roommates' video/DVD collection:
Alejandro Sanz's "Los Singles"
Matrix (not The Matrix, just Matrix)
American Beauty
Amelie
Flamenco: Video Souvenir
Dirty Dancing
El Talento de Mr. Ripley
Love Actually
Bridget Jones Sobrevivire
54
Jackie Brown
Como Agua Para Chocolate

Here we all sleep with the windows and doors (except front door) open to encourage as much air circulation as possible. After walking home, the apartment feels like a little oven, but if you're still and sitting in front of a window or patio door where the breeze is coming in it's not so bad.

I never know what I'll find when I get home from school. Sometimes everyone plus some are here, chatting in the kitchen or living room. Sometimes no one is home and I have the place to myself until I go to bed. Sometimes there are one or two people here, but they go out shortly after I arrive. (Do I really smell that bad? =*) When there ARE people here, they are always v. friendly...asking me how I'm doing, how my day went, how the classes are going, etc. If I ask them to, they'll repeat things for me or speak a little more slowly. I still can't keep up with the normal pace of their conversation. I'm not used to listening that quickly.

09 August 2007

Observations

My whole world seems to be about observations right now. All week long we've been observing classes and having to write up reports...only the reports aren't due until tomorrow so of course I'm spending my evening typing mine up. I'm only one behind, but these things take a lot of time. You have to write up, in detail, each stage of the lesson, of which there are 4-6: what the students were doing, what the teacher did, why, a reflection on the effectiveness of the techniques employed in that stage. And then you have to do an overall summary and say whether you think the learning objectives for the lesson were met, why you think so, and what you might have done differently. Perhaps it wouldn't be so time-consuming if I didn't try to jot down every little gesture or reaction...and of course if I weren't so opinionated. I'm having to take breaks to stay sane(ish).

Other observations:
-In general, Spanish men are shorter than American men. I've noticed this on the street and in bars/restaurants...and I noticed it just now when the next door neighbor knocked on the door looking for one of my roommates. (I also happened to notice, because he wasn't wearing a shirt, that the next door neighbor has an incredible chest. Joder, tio!)
-There are quite a few madrilenos with small dogs that follow them, leashless, around the city. These dogs are well-behaved: they don't stray away from their owners, not even to say hello to other dogs. The only dogs I've seen barking or snapping at other dogs have all been on leashes. There was one guy who came into the patisserie this morning where I was having my coffee whose dog, without having to be told, stopped just outside the entrance to the patisserie and sat, waiting patiently, until his owner came out and then got right up and trotted after him. Absolutely amazing. I have no idea how they get them trained like that.
-Also at the patisserie this morning, the OK GO song "Invincible" suddenly came on. It's one of my favorite songs by that group...one of my favorite songs ever, actually...and it just seemed so weird to have it pop up out of nowhere to bless my morning. Gotta love it.

08 August 2007

Just Call Me Grumpy Grumperton

It's Day 3 of the course and we're all exhausted already. Not a good sign. Hoping it will pass. Was extremely grumpy and impatient today...suppose it doesn't help that I haven't really had anything to eat. I wasn't hungry at lunch for some reason, so I just had a little bit of tortilla espanola (kind of like a french omelette with potatoes in) and a Diet Coke...only here they call it Coca Cola Light because a diet just means all the stuff you eat and does not mean that you're trying to lose weight by modifying your eating habits. Now I am hungry, but I haven't gone to the supermarket for food and I don't have time to go out to find something because I have so much homework. Tedious, tedious homework that takes for f'ing ever and does not seem to help me much. And am very confused now because our instructor insisted today that "caught" and "bought" do not rhyme with "spot" in American English. She is Australian and when she pronounces the words there is a noticeable difference in the vowel sounds, but I'll be damned if I can hear the difference in the vowel sounds when I say those words. Did not want to have a long drawn out argument about it but must admit that I felt a little offended, like she was suggesting that I don't know my own accent. I tend to think I have a pretty good ear for languages too. Whatever.

So yes, I'm grumpy today. Nothing more to say about that really.

Brynn--thanks for the note. Actually would LOVE to hear about assessment drama at this point, as it might remind me that I have it pretty good right now. =*) Though I have a hard time imagining there is much happening in that quarter right now. Isn't all the faculty still on vacation?

Joe--No, there's no wireless router, just a modem. I'm going to have to wait to see BSG. Am hoping my friend Chris will get the episodes for me so we can have a marathon over Christmas break.

Chris--Hint, hint! =*)

Mom brought up an interesting point in relation to my previous post about becoming a different person. Her observations helped me realize that one of my main motivators for wanting to live abroad and travel the world is that I want to feel more comfortable and at ease in the world...to expand my comfort zone by first stepping out of it and then making myself comfortable in a completely new and foreign situation. I think this relates to my perception that I am "different" (which I know pretty much everyone thinks about themselves) and that I don't really "belong" anywhere. If I don't belong anywhere in particular, I might as well belong anywhere at all, right? Though of course the strength of that theory is somewhat lessened when I remember that I do think of Portland as home. I do feel I belong there.

But enough for today. Back to the homework and then to bed for what I pray will be a very refreshing night's sleep.

07 August 2007

Internet in the House!

We have high-speed Internet in the house! It was always here, but for various reasons I do not always have easy access to it. It is not wireless, so only one person at a time can use it and usually one of the roommates is on. Evidently the Spanish are almost as addicted to the Internet as I am.

Today things seem inconvenient and unnecessarily difficult. I couldn't open a bank account because I'd left my passport at the apartment, and then I had to spend the majority of the last of my cash on my mobile phone because their credit card machine was broken but it was about closing time so I didn't have time to go to a different store. So now I don't have enough cash to open a bank account anyway. But Mom has sent my checks and replacement credit & debit cards to me...they should be arriving tomorrow...so hopefully I'll be able to open an account with one of those options.

Second day of class went fine. Was feeling a bit tired because have not been sleeping well due to the heat, but tonight is a bit cooler. Thank goodness. So far I'm feeling a bit lost on the coursework...I'm doing it but it's not coming together for me yet...but of course is only the second day. Am a little worried because so far teaching EFL here does not sound so great, but then again we haven't started practice teaching yet. Maybe will be more appealing when I actually get to do it a little. The practice teaching starts next week, so I won't have to wait long to find out.

Still getting along well with the other course participants. We all went out for a beer after school today. The last course participant has arrived. He is British, but unfortunately is not cute. Oh well. We have still to meet the students from the other section of the course, so there is still hope for a hottie. ;*) We meet them on Friday.

Got more free drinks from the camarero at the local bar last night. He asked me to marry him, but I had to turn him down because he's too old (in his late 40's or early 50's is my guess). We have a similar sense of humor, and it feels neat to be able to connect with a native outside of the apartment.

I noticed when I went out with the coursemates to lunch and after school today it was assumed none of us spoke Spanish well. I am treated differently when I am on my own. I am not seen as one of a herd of noisy and slightly scary Americans. Instead, I am an American who speaks Spanish and is living in Madrid. I am treated with more...respect maybe. It's interesting. Slightly annoying to speak Spanish to the waiters when I am in the group and have them misunderstand me NOT because I am saying it incorrectly but because of their assumption that I do not really speak Spanish. But amusing too, I guess. For example: asked the waiter at lunch if they had a menu del dia (set menu from which you can choose a first plate, second plate, drink and dessert) but he stopped listening after menu and started pointing to all the menus on the table (which are called cartas). In other words, he thought I didn't know the proper word for menu in Spanish, that I was tricked by the false cognate, and he was assuming that I was making the same mistake all the other English-speakers make. But the second time I asked him he listened.

Well, it's getting late (10:30pm) and I have homework to do. No stopping in to the local bar tonight. Hasta manana.

06 August 2007

First Day of School

Had my first day of the TEFL course today. There are eight of us total in this section, though one has yet to show. I already feel bonded with the classmates, though of course we don´t know each other very well. There are three of us girls and four guys. Five of us are from the United States, one is from Australia, and one is from Malaysia. Everybody seems intelligent, nice and full of personality. All but one of us (and maybe me) plan to stay in Spain after the course is over, though the other two girls may go to Valencia or somewhere else where this is a coast.

I was musing late last night that perhps the main reason this adventure is so scary is because I know that this time I have volunteered to surrender myself and become a different person. And I don´t know who that person will be or whether I will like her....I don´t know to what extent I will lose my current self. My mom says she still recognizes in me the person I was at a few months old, but I am not so sure that I have any kind of stable core that will remain through all my experiences.

I´m getting along fine with my roommates. I just accept that there will be noise late into the night. It´s too hot to sleep anyway. Sara´s brother is visiting for the week & he is kinda cute, so there will be some eye candy around for a while. =*)

Last night I went to a cafe after the locutorio (Internet place) to get something to eat. All they had were potato chips and day-old cheese, but I stayed a while because the bartender was really nice and there was this hilarious drunk lady who kept talking up a storm but I didn´t understand a thing she said except for the swear words (palabrotas are my specialty) and then this other old guy who didn´t say much but seemed very nice and reminded me of my host father in Sevilla a little. I think he bought my drink, but when I asked the bartender what I owed he said that they were on the house (no mention of the other guy) so I´m not sure. My listening comprehension is not what I would like it to be. I often have to ask people to repeat themselves, and if they don´t speak slowly I don´t understand much. But I suppose it will improve with time and practice.

05 August 2007

Madrid again

I´m still feeling homesick...especially, for some reason, when I see parts of American made-for-TV movies dubbed into Spanish on the TV...but am much much better than I was before. After some glitches, have settled into my room & that feels good. Then got bored because I have no book to read or Internet to play with, so I´ve come out into the street for Internet and food.

School starts tomorrow. I´m excited, but nervous that I won´t make it on time. The travel alarm clock I bought in Santiago is only good for telling time and sucks as an alarm clock (i.e. doesn´t go off and I swear it´s not operator error this time). But luckily I have roommates to impose upon. Met a second one today, Pedro, who is a professor of Geology at the university. Seems weird to me that a professor would have to share an apartment with three other people, but maybe he prefers to live with roommates until he gets married. Have yet to meet the third, Laura, though she´s supposed to be around during the week.

That´s about it for now. Oh, except to report that the streets smell alternately like food and urine. (Someone asked.) Except today, because there were a couple downpours (HOORAY FOR RAIN!!!) so there was also the sweet smell of summer rain on hot pavement. I love that smell.

04 August 2007

Mullets and kids abound

I´ve had a special request for some observations about the people here. This I can tell you: mullets are in, as is having kids. I didn´t understand mullets the first time, and I´m absolutely horrified that they´ve been resurrected in any part of the world. And not only are many male Spaniards wearing mullets, but some of them take it even a step further and DRED their mullets! OH, THE HORROR!!! And then there are way more small kids and pregnant women than I ever remember seeing in 2001. Maybe it´s because I´m in the north of Spain this time, or maybe the birth rate has increased in the last 6 years...but there are little kids everywhere. Noisy, spoiled little buggers they are, too.

What else? Most Spaniards seem very cold to me. They don´t smile at each other unless they know one another. They don´t look you in the eye. The don´t seem to like it when you smile at their dogs or their kids. They don´t seem open to connecting with strangers. I never considered Americans particularly friendly until I realized how cold the Spanish could be. But there have been some very kind people here too...the owners of our hostel here (La Alianza) are exceptionally kind, and there have been a few very kind bar/restaurant owners too. And of course my Facebook friends are very kind and open too. Willing to put up with all my inane questions about the culture/daily life here, willing to entertain a couple of American women and take us around for drinks & tapas.

03 August 2007

A Coruña (part deux)

I think I prefer Santiago to A Coruña. Santiago was charming (just talking about Old Town), but A Coruña is much newer, all made of glass and modern buildings. The beach is just a small crescent below the street and is always crowded. I haven´t tried going down there. Despite all the tourist attractions, there isn´t much here that interests me. Though Julie and I are going to the art museum this morning, which I look forward to.

I started a new novel yesterday, borrowed from Julie, called "Hard Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World." It´s by a Japanese author, Haruki Murakami. So far it´s fantastic. Like a Japanese Italo Calvino. It gives me something to do besides going bar-hopping, which is already old.

I´m looking forward to settling in to a place in Madrid and developing a routine. Maybe cooking some of my own food. I´m actually tired of eating out...mostly because there´s a limited variety of foods I´m willing to pay for and eat. I´m tired of going out at night too. Really I´d be happy with a plate of jamon and queso and a beer at 9 or 10pm and calling it good, but it somehow feels wrong to return to the hostel earlier than 11 or 12. As though I´m not making an effort to participate in the culture. I´m also looking forward to starting school and making more friends.

02 August 2007

A Coruña

There seems to be a higher concentration of dogs in Galicia than there were in Madrid. In Santiago especially, they were everywhere!! And yesterday afternoon Julie & I went to the Parque de la torre de Herculés (in A Coruña) and there were dogs running around everywhere. Even big ones, like labs, which we did not see so much in Santiago. So cute! I just love doggies.

We caught the noon bus from Santiago to A Coruña yesterday. No problems there. Our hostel here is La Alianza, right next to the Plaza Mayor and two streets away from the water. Did a lot of walking around yesterday, with a nice long nap from about 3-6pm...necessary due to all the noise and therefore lack of sleep in Santiago. And then of course they´re having a festival here too so there was a super loud concert in the Plaza last night, but I pretended it was the TV and was able to go to sleep.

Julie & I have split up for the morning. She´s off visiting a couple science museums (in which I have minimal interest), so I went and had my morning coffee and then came in search of this Internet place. Very odd shows on TV in the café where I had coffee. Some kind of daytime talk show with 4 men and 1 woman...they were talking about how some famous guy seems to prefer older women, and then all of a sudden there was a boy group on. They were wearing kind of preppy clothes but their hair was all punked out...one of the guys was wearing a headband like you´d see on women in the states...another was wearing a tennis wristband (for wiping off sweat) as an accessory. The band was introduced and they talked a little in Spanish while the girls in their early teens stared and grinned, and then they broke out into the song "Stand By Me." In English. All seemed very strange to me, but I suppose if I kept up with U.S. pop culture & daytime TV that would seem stupid too.

We´re here for two more nights and then we head back to Madrid on Saturday.